I was low on food as I descended Leigh
High Gap in Pennsylvania, which is the scariest portion of the trail south of
New Hampshire for a guy with vertigo.
A town was nearby, but I was always in a rush to get to the finish with
what little time I had allotted myself.
I stubbornly and foolishly crossed over the highway and started up the
south side of the gap after a quick smoke break to collect myself after stressing about falling off a small cliff. About 100 meters into my climb there
was a white plastic bag hanging from a tree branch next to the trail with something
inside of it.
The bag contained a styrofoam cup with
a lid on it. Somebody had left
food! Trail Magic. Thank God. I looked around and saw nobody waiting for the poison to
kick in to take advantage of my sweaty, stanky, sexy self, but safety first...
I just tossed it in my bag for later.
I found a spring at the first shelter I came to and filled up. As I peaked the ridge, the path became
all spiky looking rocks and utterly miserable for hiking. I looked for alternate paths and found
that everything off the trail was way worse. Charlie Mike.
After a couple of miles on the ridge I
could hear the sound of a gun shooting very sporadically. As a combat veteran my senses were on
high alert, but common sense told me it was probably just a hunter. The more I walked, the closer the gunshots
sounded. Then I could hear
chatter. The chatter got louder as
the gunshots were probably an annoyance to any conversation. This allowed me to get close without
immediate detection. What animal
has evaded these hunters with apparently no aim? I came around a turn in the trail and was startled at what I
saw.
"Eh main, you seen any ginsaaaang?" a sweaty, size
large man asked as I froze.
There
was a pale, red headed, freckle faced girl in her 20's about 150 meters away
and between us was the doppelgänger of the bad guy from "Summer of Sam." He had a nice looking unholstered
silver pistol with no actual holster in sight. He was just flinging it around shooting at random things. Along with a psychotic look, apparent
itchy face and rotting teeth the girl had a plastic bag with what looked to be
cooking utensils. I couldn't
figure out the bag of utensils at that moment, but suspected meth was a part of
their diet and gun safety didn't look like it took priority over that diet.
"Some what?" I asked
"Ginsaaaang."
Now,
I'm from the suburbs and I thought he was trying to say ginseng, but without
subtitles I really couldn't be sure.
Even if he was trying to say ginseng, why would he ask me that? I thought you bought ginseng at a GNC
store or some shit. I decided to
play dumb, but at the same time act like I knew what he was talking about as
well as replicate his accent to hopefully build a rapport and not get shot in
the face as there was nowhere to go but straight at him.
"Naw main, not seen any that in some time... sawry."
"Aight then, no troubles."
"I surrrre hope ya'll find some up in these parts."
"Thankya main. Say, where you goin'?"
"Geoja."
"Oh, well gewd luck with all that."
"Thankya main! Ya'll take care naw."
How
about those skills? As I passed
the man and looked at his eyes, his pupils were dilated and he looked
out-of-it. I raised my shoulders
so my pack would cover the back of my head and hopefully he would miss if he
decided to search for ginseng in my brains. You never know what you're going to get with a couple of tweaking meth heads and a pistol. The female was next and she was just staring out into the woods with her
jaw dropped and on the verge of drooling.
This was the scariest run-in with humans that I had on the entire
trail.
I
moved faster and faster trying to create distance as their voices faded. Eventually I crossed over a dirt road
where I saw a black SUV they were probably driving and continued the fuck on at
good pace. Soon after the road, I
came to a clearing with a couple hundred meters worth of a boulder scramble. I seriously doubted they would come
this way and I felt safe again.
Two girls were headed in my direction
as I jumped from boulder to boulder.
I warned them of the creepers and recommended they proceed with
caution. I tried to translate what
the man had said to me until one of them figured it out.
"Oh! They're trying to crop ginseng. It's a really
expensive root you can find around here during like... a two week period in the
year."
I'll
be damned. So in order to make
ginseng that you purchase at a GNC store, you have to use ginseng root. The bag that crazy girl had was full of
cropping tools. My shameful dumbass sensors
spiked and I just smiled. The
girls were grateful for the warning and assured me the next shelter was only a
few miles away. On I went to that
shelter, started a fire as it began to sprinkle and I opened the styrofoam cup. I had no idea what kind of food it was,
but I could make out some kind of bean and rice mix. I devoured it, had a smoke and had to sleep real close in the small shelter to the
annoying hikers that came in late.
They bragged about having rum, but didn't want to offer any. How rude! It's hiker etiquette to offer booze... ESPECIALLY LIQUOR TO
A THRU-HIKER IN PAIN YOU SONS OF BITCHES. Another day gone and the mental boost of Harper's Ferry
couldn't come soon enough.
